Is your pup posh enough for canine cologne? We test the best dog de-stinkers - freetxp

Is your pup posh enough for canine cologne? We test the best dog de-stinkers

Donna Karan once concocted a fragrance that recreated the scent of her husband’s neck. My own beloved’s smell is warm, powdery, mineral, velvet plush.

If the aroma were reproduced by a perfume house nose, it would be earthy and flintily elemental. And I would bury my nose in it constantly.

In my capacity as a middle-aged woman, said beloved is obviously a dog: Pimlico, my beautiful blue whippet. Besotted, I am constantly kissing Pim while imbibing her silken scent. And, yet, as Britain’s 3.2million new lockdown dog owners will attest, there are times when our four-legged friends do not smell so sublime after rolling in duck poop.

Hannah says Kiehl¿s Cuddly-Coat Cleansing Spritz is a convenient, no-rinse cleansing spray with a barely-there aroma

Hannah says Kiehl’s Cuddly-Coat Cleansing Spritz is a convenient, no-rinse cleansing spray with a barely-there aroma

So, how to mitigate the issue? I give you the fragrance industry’s hot new genre: canine cologne. Britain’s 11 million-plus hounds now come not merely pampered, but perfumed.

‘Can this be wise?’ I ask south London’s hound whisperer, Adam Tinsley of the Goddard Veterinary Group, who has saved Pim’s life on numerous occasions. Won’t these artificial scents upset her nose and skin? ‘

Owners use them in conjunction with bathing, or as a spruce between washes,’ he says, ‘They’re designed for dogs, so are not an issue for their skin. And it’s a lot better than smelling like fox urine.’

I did invest in a canine cologne before Pim arrived, paranoid about having one of those homes where the reek of damp dog is obvious to all but its owner.

The spritz I opted for was BOS Naturals Baby Powder & Aloe Vera Scented Dog Cologne, which I bought on Amazon enticed by its being natural, British-made and subtly unobtrusive. But how does BOS stack up against its rival dog de-stinkers? Pim and I sniffed out the best of the bunch…

FOR BATH-PHOBICS

Kiehl’s Cuddly-Coat Cleansing Spritz (£15, for 250ml, kiehls.co.uk)

They say: ‘Formulated with chamomile flower extract and glycerin, this freshly-scented formula helps spot clean and deodorise pups on the go. Spray for a healthy looking shine.’

What that means: A convenient, no-rinse cleansing spray with a barely-there aroma. The smell: Minimal freshness.

Best for: Bath-phobic hounds.

Paw points: 8/10

HEADACHE-INDUCING

Peach Bum Natural Parfum For Lady Dogs (£12 for 250ml, dogslovehownd.com)

Peach Bum Natural Parfum For Lady Dogs gives you a headache, according to Hannah

Peach Bum Natural Parfum For Lady Dogs gives you a headache, according to Hannah

They say: ‘A feminine fragrance with heart notes of sweet orange, jasmine and peach.’

What that means: A sickly affront to all creatures great and small.

The smell: Cloyingly saccharine bargain-basement pot pourri.

Best for: Giving you a headache.

Paw points: 0/10

GROOMER’S CHOICE

BOS Naturals Baby Powder And Aloe Vera Scented Dog Cologne (£13.59 for 250ml, amazon.co.uk)

BOS Naturals Baby Powder And Aloe Vera Scented Dog Cologne is Hannah's dog, Pimlico's, favorite and so is awarded 10/10 paw points

BOS Naturals Baby Powder And Aloe Vera Scented Dog Cologne is Hannah’s dog, Pimlico’s, favorite and so is awarded 10/10 paw points

They say: ‘The most popular scent with professional groomers. It contains aloe vera which helps with the nourishing of the coat and skin. We offer a 100 per cent money back guarantee.’

What that means: Pimlico gets drenched in it when she rolls in fox pee.

The smell: Powdered baby skin.

Best for: Silken whippets.

Paw points: 10/10

AFTERSHAVE STYLE

Barbour Dog Cologne (£14.95 for 100ml, johnlewis.com)

Barbour Dog Cologne keeps dogs smelling fresh with its traditional aftershave scent

Barbour Dog Cologne keeps dogs smelling fresh with its traditional aftershave scent

They say: ‘A dog cologne to refresh and soothe skin to keep them smelling fresh.’

What it means: A cologne in the most ballsy sense.

The smell: Traditional aftershave.

Best for: The four-legged pals of golfers and country-pubbers?

Paw points: 5/10

SEASIDE SCENT

Men’s Society Good Dog Cologne in Coastal (£9.50 for 200ml, johnlewis.com)

Hand-crafted on the Norfolk coast, Men¿s Society Good Dog Cologne in Coastal, smells of 'flinty rocks and sea air'

Hand-crafted on the Norfolk coast, Men’s Society Good Dog Cologne in Coastal, smells of ‘flinty rocks and sea air’

They say: ‘Hand-crafted on the Norfolk coast, this natural scent is the perfect finishing touch to a bathing routine.’

What it means: A minimal approach with a luxury feel.

The smell: Flinty rocks and sea air.

Best for: Subtle scent for the poshest pets.

Paw points: 9/10

DOGGY DE-STINKER

Bramley Digby Dog Deodorizing Spray (£14, bramleyproducts.co.uk)

Bramley Digby Dog Deodorizing Spray is naturally antifungal, antiseptic and antibacterial

Bramley Digby Dog Deodorizing Spray is naturally antifungal, antiseptic and antibacterial

They say: ‘This cedarwood and peppermint spray has a higher pH so it’s suitable for your dog’s sensitive skin. It is naturally antifungal, antiseptic and antibacterial.’

What it means: A dog de-stinker with health benefits.

The smell: Juicy Fruit chewing gum.

Best for: Hippy hounds whose long locks call for a groom.

Paw points: 7/10

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